December 26, 2009
Time off
I don’t like time off, I really don’t. I feel so inactive, so useless, purposeless. I have not done anything productive today except cook dinner, help D assemble some of her Christmas gifts, and call people in Sweden to thank them for the lovely gifts.
Time off gives my brain time to think, and I am a rather heavy thinker. I need to be involved in things, busy, that makes me happy. Having time off…. doesn’t.
I go back to school on the 7th, and that is way too far away, and I don’t like it. Sure, I know I am going to be swamped in the spring, working extra hours, taking 20 credits, as well as skating once a week (I really need to get back into shape – really…) and I am going to be tired out of my mind, but at least I will be doing something, moving forward in life. Breaks are just that – breaks. Pauses in the natural rhythm. As humans, we need to evolve, move forward. Right now I am not moving and it is annoying the hell out of me.
Tomorrow I am going to go to Walmart, to pick up a couple of things and then I am going to go to Barnes and Noble and waste some time there. Sarah will be moving back soon, so I will have some company.
God I am bored.
December 12, 2009
December Update
It’s been a long fall. Not a bad one, just a very busy one. I took 19 credits this semester, as well as got a job in the tutorial and academic success center. I have literally been on campus every day from 7:30 to after 5. Nights I have studied, and weekends I have been very tired, as well as trying to run a “weekend family.” It’s funny; I realized a lot of people don’t consider you a family here until there are children involved. I guess on week days we are simply a married couple….. Anyways….
Even though it’s been a rough fall, it has been one of the best mentally so far for me here. I feel good. Sure, I get moody once in a while, but that is just life. I am starting to fit in better, and I am feeling a lot surer about who I am and what I want to do in life. I did not realize that I had not quite figured that out yet. I thought I knew what I wanted, but apparently not. There have been a lot of choices to make, and hubby has been great about it all, helping me when I need it, but still letting me to stand on my own two feet. I am a very independent person, after all. But I feel I am satisfied with what I have chosen, which is important.
One of the things I have changed once again is my major. I was going to do history, then Public Relations, and now, I am going to do anthropology. This is what I will be applying for in about a month at our local University. We did a lot of soul searching on that one… But I think that is what I need to be happy with myself, regardless of later status. I don’t want to spend so much money on tuition if it is not something I am going to enjoy studying. I may seem fickle on this one, I know, sorry about that. But am I going to be happy working for a public relations company? No. I will be better off teaching somewhere, being the annoying, bossy, besserwisser I really am.
My husband is in Europe for a couple of weeks. I really miss him, and it is so lonely here without him. I am keeping myself busy though, since these weeks are the last two of the semester. I have a lot of last-minute tests and presentations, as well as 7 finals. It’s a bit different from the spring semester, when I only had 4 classes, but had finals in like 2 of them. I am swamped, and if I hear more about environmental biology, geography, American history, World Civilizations and math I think I am going scream. And if someone even mentions being creative and writing stories I will stab them to death with my ball-point pen. I am done with two of my finals though, and I am anxiously awaiting the results. I know I will have them before hubby comes back, but that’s about it. It won’t be another 4.0, I know that, but that’s okay. I am not perfect, nor do I need to be.
I have been getting allergy shots for a while now. I don’t know if it is working yet, but Linda, the lady who administers the shots told me that I should be able to eat apples in the fall. I am thrilled and can’t wait. It’s been so long. The shots are alright, some days they hurt like hell, and once in a while my arm swells up and aches for days (but this is only if I have not been taking the extra dosage of allergy medicine as they told me to. So I really can only blame myself for that….). It does make sense that I am having some extra reactions though; they are literally injecting me with EVERYTHING I am allergic to at once. We have built up my tolerance though, and yesterday (Friday) I finally got to come off the increasing colors (different dosages, different concentration) and have moved to maintenance, which is red, which I will stay as for the rest of my shots. I also no longer have to come in twice a week; we are down to once now. This will continue for another 3 months or so, and then it will gradually become less over time. It is all worth it though, it really is.
It is Christmas in a couple of weeks. It is technically my second Christmas here, since the first one we went beck to Sweden. The plans are still up in the air, which I don’t like, but I can’t do much about. Hubby will have to talk to Ds mother when he comes home. Though she was actually friendly when I dropped D off last Sunday. Might have been because she got money (for Ds new phone…. *sigh* don’t ask….), but still. I was also thrilled, because D hugged me, right there in the parking lot, right in front of her mother. It meant a lot (hasn’t happened before). Anyways, Christmas will be nice, I am sure if it, regardless of what happens. All I know is that I will be making turkey regardless.
My graduation ceremony will be May 12th, even though I technically will not graduate until end of June, since they don’t do any ceremonies during the summer. I am SO excited though. I will have an official college degree! This is HUGE! Cap, gown, diploma, I am doing it all! We might have a small get-together after the ceremony, not that we know a lot of people here, but I am sure some people will come for me. And then I will start in the anthropology department at our local University in the fall, if I am accepted that is. I am sure that I will though, as long as I keep my grades decent. I know they raised the entrance requirements to like a 2.5 in GPA. That should not be a problem; hopefully I can get my boss to sign a recommendation letter to the entrance committee.
I am sitting here munching candy-canes (seriously, they were like $1 at Toys R Us today), listening to French soundtracks with a pile of books beside me. Also, there is a large plastic tub with Lego in it here too. I bought it today for D for Christmas. She is a little strange that girl, rather immature for her age. I mean Rebecka would not have been caught dead playing with Lego at 11, but then again, she has two older sisters to model, D has only a brother, and he isn’t exactly the best role model in the world…..
Speaking about Rebecka, I got her the best Christmas gift yesterday. She isn’t the easiest kid to shop for, I’ll tell you that, impossible to get a straight answer out of. We had come to an agreement, which fell through, and then we tried again, but her gift did not make it into the large box of gifts that left for Sweden on the 2nd of December. I was about to give up and go to Target and pick her up a pajamas (fun? No, but it was the only thing she would approve for me to buy that she might actually use) when I went into Hallmark on a whim to see if they had stamps (I later forgot about buying the stamps…) and saw it, and I just knew if was a great gift. A bit sentimental, yes, but the kid is sentimental too. Spent a bit too much of course, but I love it. Hopefully she will too. It is on its way to Sweden as of this morning, and I hope it will make it on time for Christmas.
Nope, time to finish this up and head into the shower to get ready for bed. Sure it is 9:20 PM on a Saturday, but what else am I going to do? Life? Friends? What is that? (Just kidding….). I know this has been a bit long, sorry about that, but hopefully it will help make up for the fact that I haven’t updated for over two months. I’ll try to update relatively soon again.
October 11, 2009
Sunday morning
I am tired this morning, really tired. I am on a new medicine regiment at the moment, beyond the allergy shots I am already on. For a while back now, I have been having trouble with my legs. They have been itchy and blotchy, and me being the stupid person I am have been itching. It first presented it as a problem in maybe April, and then went on as a bother for a couple of months. My mum helped in Sweden and told me about a cortisone lotion I should use. It worked wonderfully and the problems finally went away. Now, fast forward to a couple of weeks ago. It all came back and came back in full force. The last week has been torturous and neither calamine lotion or cortisone lotion would help. My oh so sensitive husband told me “Oh, I am sure that is a parasite-infestation.” Gee, thanks honey, as if I wasn’t freaked out already as it was….. Idiot. For all those degrees he has, he can be really tactless and dumb once in a while.
So, I haven’t been able to make it to the doctor’s office, due to my tight school schedule, but since Fall Break started Friday, I could finally go. I made it there and didn’t have to wait TOO long to be seen. Unfortunately, I got Dr. N. I usually see Dr. Q, but for some reason he was not there, and I got stuck with Dr. N. Now, this is the lady which told me that I had a hole in my oesophagus after I fell in figure skating and severely bruised my ribs, and sent me home with anti-acids. So I don’t trust her at all. But nevertheless, I was kinda forced to deal with her, since I am not going to have a chance to go to see the doctor until Thanksgiving. So, anyways, she saw me, and diagnosed me with dyshidrotic eczema. Which, by the way, is a completely impossible diagnosis; dyshidrotic eczema affects ONLY the hands and soles of the feet. But I do believe it is a type of eczema, so I am taking the medication and using the lotion she prescribed anyway (after reading and realizing that this medication cures a multitude of different eczema). So far, it is working. No more itching, and as far as I can see, no new red spots.
We are going skating today, roller skating, and then Tuesday we are going skating in a real ice rink. It is nerve-wracking, seeing as how I have not been on the ice for over a year. Hubby is back to taking lessons, so he is skating on a regular basis again, but I can’t, due to my school-schedule and work. Weekends belong to D, we all know that…….. But as said, I am finally stepping onto the ice on Tuesday. I am super excited, and a bit nervous. I already know my feet are going to be hurting like hell of course.
We are having company over tonight too, which is always refreshing. I will be making meatballs and potatoes, very Swedish.
September 29, 2009
Recent stuff
Today was my first day at work. It was intense, since there was so much new stuff to learn, but it was exciting. I think I am going to fit in very well there. I also had my first walk-in tutoring student! Terrifying, but gratifying. We did math 70, so it wasn’t killer stuff, but I was so nervous going in! There is a girl at work who doesn’t seem too happy that I am there, since I am her replacement. She’s a bit snippy, which makes asking her questions about the work I am supposed to be doing a bit hard. Unfortunately my boss has me working with her for another three weeks. Oh well.
Now, about the hair. I love it. It looks great, and I have gotten SO much positive feedback from my peers at school (making me a bit suspicious about how they thought I looked before….. ahem…. 
) It does make me look older, definitely, and hubby wasn’t too happy at first. I think he has come around now. What is it with men and long hair? Seriously? Anyways, we cut like 13 inches, which will be shipped off to locks of love. It’s pretty high maintenance though, which I guess I am going to have to get used to.
School is fine, a bit intense though. I had three tests last week (geography, math and BioLab) and three this week (American History, World Civilization and Environmental Biology). I did pretty well on the ones last week (120, 85, 100) and today my AmHis test was pretty decent. I have the two others before 10 am tomorrow. Eeek! I am terrified.
I also have allergy shots tomorrow again, and then Friday before we go and pick D up from school. Oh joy. Oh well, only 4 more years of this to go!
We are starting to compile Christmas/Birthday lists for everyone. D has already decided what she WILL get (yeah right) and it is some type of electrical scooter. Ain’t gonna happen. Maybe a regular one though, one of those you kick? I guess we will see. I would like to get her books, since she doesn’t read nearly enough, but I know it will just be a waste of money. The ban of removing things from our house will stand though. The things she gets here will stay here. Funnily enough, most of her stuff has somehow made its way to her mother’s house anyways (I told him this would happen). It is sad that we now have to search her bag for things she tries to sneak out. But it is necessary, since she NEVER brings it back! Somehow she has managed to sneak out an entire Lego Coast Guard Set (in pieces I am guessing), because she knows she is not allowed! Sigh…. And I am the bad guy for realizing it….. Of course.
Anyways, back to schoolwork!
September 23, 2009
I got the job!
I got it! I am so excited. I’ll probably work for like 6-10 hours a week, Tuesday and Thursday mornings, when I’d usually have a sleep-in. I might also do Thursday afternoons for a couple of hours. I will work mostly in the office and at the front desk, but pitch in with tutoring if it is needed. They also have tutoring-clinics 8 times this fall on Saturdays, so if they need some extra help, I’ll be called in. I will mainly be answering phones, filing, helping students to fill out forms, and answer questions. I start Tuesday morning at 8!
I had two tests today, and I think I did good on both of them. I definitely did well on the Geography test, but might have spelled the Czech Republic wrong. The Bio-LAB test was easier than I had anticipated.
So overall, a very good day. Very long, and I am totally beat, but a good day. Tomorrow I start my allergy shots, and I have a hair appointment at 3. It will be another long day away from home.
September 22, 2009
Excited!
I have a job interview tomorrow at 10! It’s at the school, another work-study program, but listen to this – they called me. I didn’t even apply for this position, they called me and asked if I’d like to work for them! It is in the Tutoring and Academic Success Center, so I would work in the office as well as help tutor students in like math and English (oh yeah, Swedish girl tutoring Americans in English. Priceless, I know…). I am super-excited about this, I really am. They called me due to my GPA. This hard work is finally starting to PAY off. Oh yes, I would actually get paid to do this.
So not only so I have two tests tomorrow to freak out about and be nervous for, I also have a really important interview. It was actually Joy, the lady in charge of TASC, who called me.
I had my second math test today as well, and I felt really good about it. Hopefully I will get the results fast.
Anyway, I probably won’t be able to let you guys know how I did until pretty late, I’m stuck in school until 5. If I can, I’ll sneak onto my twitter real quick in the library and post, in case I find out then and there if they want me or not. Otherwise, I’ll put it here as soon as I get home. Wish me luck! I have a huge day tomorrow!
September 20, 2009
Update
My darling sister noted yesterday that I don’t update this blog often enough. She is right of course, I don’t. In all truth and honesty, school is kiling me right now. I am fighting rather hard to try to keep up my 4.0, which my husband claims is near impossible. I’d like to try. But it does keep me busy and come weekends, I am so tired that I have been kinda neglecting this blog for a while.
Today we are having people over, for the first time in the new place. I’m excited, but also nervous. I am not a people person and I’m not very good at making new friends. We are only having three people over, but it is still nerve-wracking for me. Silly, I know. I don’t know two of the people that are coming, they are people hubby know from school, international students, one Swede and one Swiss.
I am a little nervous about meeting the Swedish girl. Appart from the Christmas fair and the consulate in D.C, she wil be the first Swede I meet here. Besides, just because she is Swedish doesn’t mean we will get along. There is a huge part of the Swedish population I don’t like. Anyways, I am cooking dinner for all of us. It will be a pasta dish that will be oven baked. I have never done it before, so I have no clue how it will turn out. I might do a chocolate cake for dessert, I haven’t quite chosen yet. I’m not that great when it comes to the dessert-department. I guess we’ll see later how it all turns out.
I have three tests this week, and three the following week too. This week it’s Math, Geography (maps) and Bio-Lab, the next week in Geography (climate and stuff), American History and Biology. It’s going to be an intense couple of weeks. I should also get started on my two research papers.
Anyways, lots to do.
September 4, 2009
Math test
I had my very first math test Tuesday. I thought I did terrible and that I’d tanked completely. I did much better than expected, an 83.5, which is a B. Sure, it is not an A, but I really struggled with the test, so I am pleased, very pleased. This math course if a lot harder than I expected.
September 3, 2009
Hair
Very late, tired. I am getting a haircut when I get my excess grant money, which should be in a week or so. I am donating my hair to locks of love. So I am going short this time. The goal is cut and color, and it will hopefully help to make me look a little older… I am VERY tired of people thinking I am 17…. I do like having long hair, but it is getting to the point where it is ridiculously long and takes a hell of a lot of work to manage. So I am cutting it off. This is the picture I am showing my hairdresser. What do you think? (And yes, it is Jayma Mays as Emma from the new series Glee)
Allergy updates
Today I went and saw my allergy specialist. It was the first time, so I was pretty nervous, but the nurses were really nice, and the doctor seemed okay (the little I saw of him. It’s really the nurses that do most of the work anyways…). It’s bloody expensive to go to the specialist, I’ll tell you. Sure my insurance covers 75%, but it’s still a pretty hefty sum. The allergy testing in itself was painful. They put 65 dots on my back an stuck me with needles and injections of various allergens. Though that was when the worst started. After the nurse had finished and left the room (they wait 15 minutes until they come in and measure the reactions) my back started feeling like it was on fire. I am serious! It also made me pretty aware of the fact that I have some pretty serious shit going on with my allergies. It was pure torture.
After 15 minutes, the nurse came in and started measuring the reactions, while she was giving off sympathetic noises. 24 of my “dots” exhibited reactions. Some of them was minor, like soybeans, but then there was the major ones too, like various forms of pollen. I already knew half of if, I had a test done as a kid, a smaller one, so some of it came as no surprise. What did surprise me, however, was my LACK of dog allergies. I showed very little to no reaction to the three dog tests they did, which is contradictory to the last test I did.
We decided that I am going to get allergy shots, which will, in time, make me immune to most of the allergens. They will make me my very own special formula, and I will get it administered twice a week at first, and then after a couple of months, they will gradually decrease. In 3-5 years, I will be mostly symptom free, and will probably not need to eat allergy medicine. And if I am lucky, since this is to make me produce my very own antibodies, I will transfer my resistance to my children, so they will not have to live my hell. We do live in one of the worst allergy states in the country. Also, I would like my children to be able to play in the grass, eat tomatoes and apples, without having any problems. It would be nice… It is going to be expensive, but worth it. Also, imagine how much money we have spent over the years buying me allergy medicine….
Oh, I am allergic to nuts, most of them. Now I actually have it on paper. Not to shellfish though (I kinda hoped that I was… *blushes*). Also, I now have it on paper that I am allergic to raw potatoes, so from here onwards, hubby is totally responsible for peeling them. I have a doctor’s note!
